What makes family “family?”

     Of course we’ve all heard the tired phrase, “Blood is thicker than water.”  We also know what DNA and genetics mean, as well.  Sometimes family means more than that.

     About two years ago, I was a member of a geek group, based around the television series, Dark Shadows.  I saw that one of the members shared the same last name as me.  It’s a rare name and I have always been interested in genealogy.  I messaged her immediately.  She told me that she had married into the Holder family.  After exhausting research, it turned out her husband and I are distantly related.  I was thrilled.

     The odd thing is that she and I look so remarkably similar.  We had almost an immediate bond.  It’s strange that many people tell me they assume she is my actual sister and that my true sister is an in law.

     I have learned that love is what makes one a sibling, child or parent.  Do I love this young lady as much as genetic relations?  Yes, probably more so, than those I am genetically related to.  I guess what I’m saying is that family is what you make of it.  So ignore the people that bring you pain.  Embrace those you cherish.

Brian Holder


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