Top 5 Things You Do Not Say to The Silmarillion Fans

Contributor: Rick McGimpsey

5

1. So this is basically the Elvish Old Testament, right?

2. There is a Tolkien book more boring than The Lord of the Rings!? Amazing!

3. Why didn’t Iluvatar just kill Melkor before he got a chance to ruin Arda? The Valar are next to useless in the whole affair. Maybe Feanor was right!

4. Beren and Luthien and Turin Turambar are the only tales worth reading in this otherwise long, boring, overly preachy piece of nonsense.

5. I really hope Peter Jackson gets to make a three-part film of this. Screw the haters! PJ can add as many original characters, bad jokes, and non-canonical sub-plots he wants to. Just let him do it! I don’t have time to read books any more so give me more movies!

Next Monday: Top 5 Things You Do Not Say to Superman Fans

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